So its been a while since the last post - you know - the one that said I'd blog a bit more regularly! Well, I guess 2 and 1/2 months is more regular than my blog posts used to be!
Anyway, since my last epic post on our change of church, we have continued to grow as individuals and as a family within Falkirk Vineyard Church. We have all made great new friendships - including Isla - and feel like we've been there a lifetime already. The last 6 months have been full of new discoveries and the reawakening of others plus a slow and steady integration into our new setting.
This last week confirmed something for me especially though and here we come to the subject of this blog - this 'strange feeling'. Strange in the sense that its a feeling that I haven't had in a long while. Let me explain with a bit of back story.
Saturday night, Isla wasn't very well. I will spare you the details but it was a slightly messy bug!! So it was clear she wouldn't be going to church on Sunday. Kathryn and Hannah were on a special performing arts weekend thing and Carol-Anne was on her first crèche duty at church. So it was obvious that I would have to stay home with Isla. But that didn't make me happy. Infact, I'll admit to getting quite grumpy. Nothing to do with staying home to look after one of my daughters - I will happily do that any time. No - the bit making me unhappy was the not going to church bit! And this was the strange feeling. I can't remember when I last felt that gutted that I couldn't go to join with my church family for worship. Now, this is not to put down our previous churches in any way whatsoever. That is far from the purpose here. It is simply to journal the way my thought process and outworking of my faith has gone. It is to record my new found excitement for gathering to worship God and learn from Him. And actually, knowing that I was feeling this way because I was missing out on joining with my church family soon became quite a positive feeling.
So, Isla and I settled down to our morning together and, with our limited Freeview viewing options, I decided to turn to TBN - a Christian TV channel. I know - desperate times!! There were a few different preaching shows on in the morning including one from HTB - the home of the Alpha course - which had quite a good message about not hiding away. Then a notification came up on my phone that one of my church friends was live on Facebook. I followed the link and found that one of our church family was live broadcasting worship from our church! What a blessing! I could see friends and join in with the worship. During the three separate live broadcasts I suddenly felt connected. Connected to new friends. Connected in worship. Connected to God. What a blessed release.
I then returned to TBN and there was a message from Bethel church in the US. The subject of that sermon will form another blog at another time, but suffice to say, the guy was preaching on John 15 - a passage that uses the analogy of the Vineyard being the kingdom of God. As Gru said in Despicable Me - "Lightbulb!" (apologies for the deep level of quoting here!)
Unhappy? Grumpy? Not any more! Carol-Anne returned from church - I apologised for my grumpiness - normality resumed.
I don't want to go through those extreme circumstances again in a hurry but am grateful to my provider God who is all seeing and all knowing and has our best interests at heart.
Until next time...